This happened 6 months back and I had drafted this post then, but I completed it only today.
The title says bachelorhood, and I am a girl....contradicting? Well I am using the word bachelorhood, because I am not very sure if there is a word called spinsterhood and even if there is, I don't like the sound of it. So sticking to bachelorhood.
I am married for almost 2 years now and have been totally dependent on my husband for everything since the wedding. Its not that I have not lived alone before. I have, when I did work in India, Shanghai and also the initial one year I was in US. It's partly because I just don't want to grow up that if there is someone to make decisions for me, I just let them do that job. So when there were some visa issues when we went over to India in May 2010 and Sree couldn't make it back to the US with me, I was totally upset. Actually was paranoid about how I am gonna be alone at home without him and how I am gonna get things done. I remember, the first night I spent alone in the apartment, I cried.But, after the initial 2-3 days, I actually got adjusted.
Yes, there is this constant anxiety of how and when he is going to join me, or if plans are going to change and all, but the things I thought would be extremely difficult for me turned out to be manageable.
The comfort of getting a drop to cal-train station for commuting to work was no longer there. Thankfully my apartment was next to the cal-train station, so I walked to the station daily. It was a good one mile walk, but fortunately the weather was amazing. And after a few days it became a routine. After reaching back home, generally either me or Sree usually take turns in cooking( ok, I agree, most of the days its him), but now I hardly bothered about cooking. I just browse channels, do some pending work or surf the net and and then go to sleep. Time just flew. Also during weekends, I packed my bags and went to my friend's place and stayed over there for a day. She is an amazing cook, so yummy food was always around. And everyday I had constant phone calls with Sree to catch up on all the news. I also did a good amount of driving as there was no other option. So ya, situations just force you get out of your comfort zone.Well, after around 10 days, though I was doing things my own, I just wanted him to reach back soon to get back to my comfort zone.
After two weeks, we heard back from the consulate and he could travel the following week. Was pretty much thrilled and I don't want this to happen ever in my life again. I don't mind not having this space for myself.Still, I am happy that it made me realize that I can manage stuff on my own, even though some of it was hard initially. So next time he needs to go for an official trip, I am no longer worried as I know what it is like.
The title says bachelorhood, and I am a girl....contradicting? Well I am using the word bachelorhood, because I am not very sure if there is a word called spinsterhood and even if there is, I don't like the sound of it. So sticking to bachelorhood.
I am married for almost 2 years now and have been totally dependent on my husband for everything since the wedding. Its not that I have not lived alone before. I have, when I did work in India, Shanghai and also the initial one year I was in US. It's partly because I just don't want to grow up that if there is someone to make decisions for me, I just let them do that job. So when there were some visa issues when we went over to India in May 2010 and Sree couldn't make it back to the US with me, I was totally upset. Actually was paranoid about how I am gonna be alone at home without him and how I am gonna get things done. I remember, the first night I spent alone in the apartment, I cried.But, after the initial 2-3 days, I actually got adjusted.
Yes, there is this constant anxiety of how and when he is going to join me, or if plans are going to change and all, but the things I thought would be extremely difficult for me turned out to be manageable.
The comfort of getting a drop to cal-train station for commuting to work was no longer there. Thankfully my apartment was next to the cal-train station, so I walked to the station daily. It was a good one mile walk, but fortunately the weather was amazing. And after a few days it became a routine. After reaching back home, generally either me or Sree usually take turns in cooking( ok, I agree, most of the days its him), but now I hardly bothered about cooking. I just browse channels, do some pending work or surf the net and and then go to sleep. Time just flew. Also during weekends, I packed my bags and went to my friend's place and stayed over there for a day. She is an amazing cook, so yummy food was always around. And everyday I had constant phone calls with Sree to catch up on all the news. I also did a good amount of driving as there was no other option. So ya, situations just force you get out of your comfort zone.Well, after around 10 days, though I was doing things my own, I just wanted him to reach back soon to get back to my comfort zone.
After two weeks, we heard back from the consulate and he could travel the following week. Was pretty much thrilled and I don't want this to happen ever in my life again. I don't mind not having this space for myself.Still, I am happy that it made me realize that I can manage stuff on my own, even though some of it was hard initially. So next time he needs to go for an official trip, I am no longer worried as I know what it is like.
Ur post is so beautiful and simple. Like i said, i can relate to it very well coz i am going thru the same phase in life. I hope tht both of us do not have to go thru bachelorhood ever in life again!
ReplyDeleteMiss ya bommu. Chai